Friday, May 29, 2009

A Meme From Jodi (Beacon of Hope)

What activities make you lose track of time? Playing on the computer (Facebook, Blogging, editing, etc.) or having a Girls' Night Out. Next thing you know it's 2:00 AM!

What did you imagine yourself being the most when you were little? I used to play "school" a lot and thought I would be a teacher. I also wrote a newsletter for the neighbor kids with games and drawings of puppets I used to own. This would explain why I like writing.

If you could jump into any book what would it be and why? I really enjoyed the book "The Doll People" by Ann M. Martin & Laura Godwin. I could see myself entering the doll world and getting into mischeif when the humans were asleep.
Midnight Snack
What is your favorite thing to fix for dinner? If doing the dishes wasn't an issue, I like cooking a dish called Homestead Chicken Pie. It's my family's favorite.
Recipe of the Week (instead of your recipe for life what is it just for the week?) My recipe for the week: For Memorial Day - remember those who have passed on, support our military and celebrate the living. We are blessed to live in a free country.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Twisted Toiletries

This is one of the most stinkin' cutest gifts I have given. This was a Christmas present for my daughter, Ali who is 16. When I saw this in Nordstrom's, I loved the little bottle it came in. It's called Angel by Gwen Stefani. I smelled the perfume and all of her perfumes. They all had one not so subtle undertone in the scent in common. They all stunk, stank, stinketh! Yuck! But I figured if I didn't like it, Ali would. And she did. When I went downstairs to the teens' bathroom, I was in shock how clean it was. I liked how Ali had her perfume strategically placed in front of the make up brush and I just had to turn Lil' Angel slightly forward to avoid a profile.

This next photo is of the lotion I use, Victoria's Secret "Amber Romance." This is the gel my husband uses called "Got2b glued." Many a time I have almost used his gel as lotion. Their bottles are almost identical. As I told him about that, instead of him complaining that my stuff is on his side of the two sink vanity, he tells me he has almost used my lotion for gel and that he will start putting his gel away. WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY HUSBAND? Maybe this was just his way of telling me to put my stuff away, too. Pinky the rubber duck doesn't care as long as she gets her picture taken.

This last picture of toiletries is the most baffling. Do I treat zits or wrinkles?

Monday, May 25, 2009

Name that Tune Monday Answer

Name that Tune Monday - James' Jingle 5/25/09

James is the next performer.....the husband of Renae from last week. He is the one who started all this karaoke singing business and sold us the piano responsible. Thanks for all the fun you've added to our lives - not to mention what has inspired my Ali to sing! Name the tune - and yes, I've distorted the song title again. So fun!

Sunday, May 24, 2009

File Moniter

That was as good as I could get with my job. I was trying to think of some name to glorify what I do. I bought Mall Cop this weekend so my eight year old could watch it when her friend slept over. I watched it with them and I really don't know what was funnier.......the movie or the forced laughter from the girls at the really stupid parts. They almost died laughing at the segway video the grandma posted on the computer. I didn't think it was that funny, but Mimi kept rewinding the DVD. Then at the parts I laughed at - the girls remained silent for a few seconds and must have thought, "Oh. We better laugh so it looks like we got it," followed by more forced laughter.

When is forced laughter a good thing? When it's your young one practising their sense of humor out and you really want to encourage it. When is it a bad thing? When it's your husband and it just wasn't that funny and you want to discourage it.

Friday at work I brought up to the three other secretaries I work with, "You know how we come in and all day long we're sayin', 'I'm sooo tired. I have nooo energy.' What if we come in and say the opposite? What if we said, 'I have soooo much energy! I can hardly sit still! I should have a trampoline pad for my chair seat because I just can't stay in my seat."' Maybe that would take effect on us. So during the day I would say loudly and enthusiastically, "I have so much energy!" Then around 3:00 I announced with a voice as slow as Ben Stein's and my eyes half closed, "I have sooo much energy. I don't know what to do with myself." I'm going to keep working on that one.

Forced funniness, affirmed energy, what else do we need to convince ourselves of? "I love having PMS, it defines who I really am." WHATEVER. Any favorite affirmations from you?

P.S. I had another phone call dream.....the anxiety build up before the call but it had a happy ending. Dreams can be so liberating.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

You Thought Duct Tape Was Handy

How many of you have husbands that you have to beg to do things around the house? This was a problem at my house......more than I'm willing to elaborate on. One day, my husband came home from work in a bad mood and was mad the house was untidy. He was ranting and raving and started vacuuming the floor. I'm not complaining that he was vacuuming the floor, just that he was running over anything and everything that happened to be on the floor.

Of course, this changed the mood of everyone in the household, including mellow little me. (Ha!) I went to my room and closed the door, smoke coming out of my ears. I thought, "There's things I've asked to get done that haven't been done." The one thing that came to mind is hanging the curtains in our bedroom. I don't have the hand strength to operate a drill, so I had to depend on him to do the job.

"Well, if he's going to be all ornery about vacuuming because he had to do it, then I'm going to hang my own dang curtains," I thought. I'm not quite sure those were the exact words I was thinking.

So, I put the curtains in my fancy curtain rod and got the staple gun and stapled along the bottom of the rod. From a distance it looked quite nice. My husband didn't notice until the next day that I took care of one thing on the "Honey Do" list. He was quite first. Later he decided to do the job right minus the staples. "Git 'er done" is a great motto.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Almost Famous

Everyone, meet Renae. Renae, this is everyone. Renae has been a friend of mine for about 11 years. We have watched our kids grow up since before kindergarten. Renae has a very gifted voice and I'm glad she will let me be her back up singer. This is one of our friends' favorites for us to sing together. Unfortunately, the audio on my camera and/or computer doesn't allow things to sound as rich as they should, but use your imagination and guess the title and artist of this song. You made need the luck of the Irish.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Weird Wednesday

Frantic Phone Calls

I had some weird dreams this week, involving phones. The first one was: I made a phone call to someone who I've had "tensions" with. The person who answered the phone in my dream thought it was important that I tell my story to the person involved. They called the other person to the phone and I was afraid they wouldn't accept my phone call at all. When they answered I started, "You've only heard one side of the story, I think that it's important that you hear my side of the story, too." Amongst my story I had to deliver some upsetting news (that is equal to a Greek tragedy). It was weird that my subconscious thoughts were played out in a dream. Of course, in my dream my news was accepted without further tensions.

The second dream involving a frantic phone call was more stressful. There was a small girl hanging high in some power lines. People were trying to get a ladder up but they couldn't reach her. I yelled, "Has anyone called 911?" No one had. I ran around the neighborhood frantically looking for a phone to call 911. The first phone ended up being an old cell phone that was now a child's toy. The second phone told me I mis-dialed the number. Then I got a wrong number. Meanwhile, a child's life was at stake and the clock was ticking. I don't know what this dream was about. Any interpreters out there?

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Beauty and The Beast

Wuntsa ponna time, there was a beautiful girl named Beauty. Somehow, it was an effort for her to live up to the name. She had to get her hair colored every other month, which cost a small fortune. She had to watch what she ate so they wouldn't call her "Beauty and the Feast." She bought mascara in bulk and and owned stock in lipstick companies. Finally, she had to hire a personal trainer, which was another small fortune.

They called her personal trainer "The Beast." Beauty showed up at his gym early in the morning. Personally, I think mornings are horrible and have a strange allergy to them, but some people like them. The Beast never goes to bed.

"Good morning, Beastie Boy," said Beauty, as enthusiastically as she could.

"If you're talking, you're not working hard enough," said The Beast.

"But my session hasn't formally started yet, Beast," she answered.

"Doesn't matter! Quiet! Or I will keep you in this gym forever," he shouted. A horrible fate that would be, so she shut right up.

She ran on the treadmill. She did crunches. She did leg lifts. She bench pressed her body weight. She rowed into the next city and spinned until the dust turned into gold. Her abs, gluts, lats, and quads were burning. She was trapped. She couldn't muster the strength to crawl out of the gym. She was his prisoner. "Please, Beast. Let me free," she begged.

"Only if you promise to return," he answered in his raspy voice.

"I give you my word." She finally returned home. The next day she forgot about The Beast except for her aching muscles. She forgot about him until she had a dream about him and the squats he made her do because he cared for her. She awakened from her dream in a sweat and realized it was just a leg cramp causing her to have the strange dreams.

She thought of living up to the name of Beauty. "I can't stop now," she thought. "It's like having the name Joy and being full of melancholy. It's like being named Lucky and having no luck. It's like being named Angel and being sinful. I need The Beast now more than ever."

She returned to the gym prepared to give her soul to The Beast. He was happy for her return and said, "A wicked witch put a curse on me and I'm not really a beast, but a really nice guy. I like cheesecake, too." This sealed the deal and they were married and lived happily ever after in moderation.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Name That Tune Monday Answer

Blondie AKA Debbie Harry singing "Sunday Girl" who needs to hurry up and wait. Mom to Elijah guessed half of the answer but I will send a full prize to you, since it was a hard one, so send me your address!

Name That Tune Monday

This is the first of my new "Name That Tune Monday" and hope that you find it fun. I attempted to dress up like her, so don't think I wear my hair like that all the time! I do wear my favorite suit to work, though. Where there seems to be a glitch in the video is actually the title of the song. My son added that little feature. Here goes.....first one back with the correct song title and artist gets a goody! I'll post the winner at 12:00 PM MST.

Need another hint - 1979. The artist goes by two names (not preceded by "Formerly known as"). One is her band, one is her name. Another hint: She sings the same song in French as well.

On the right track, folks! Blondie is correct - the song is.... _____ Girl?

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Happy Mother's Day

First, Happy Mother's Day tomorrow to all my wonderful friends (that would be you!) Speaking of identities in my last post, wow. Becoming a mother certainly changes your identity, doesn't it? For the better, of course. What would we do without the title? I forget who I even was B.C. (Before Children).

I'm going to try a little new something on my blog, besides Twisted Tale Tuesday, which I failed to write this last week. I'm going to have a "Name That Tune Monday." Some friends and I will be singing a few lines of a song by video and the first one to name the song title and/or original artist (specified) I will send a little prize to. I hope you have fun with it. I will post it at 10:00 AM Mountain Standard Time. It will be so fun to hear from you.

Today my hubby, Jared, and I went to an antique store and I found the perfect ring. I tried it on and it was like Cinderella trying on her glass slipper. My ring size is hard to find (5 1/2) and it was my size and beautiful. Since I've lost so much weight my other wedding set doesn't fit. So, darn, I had to get a new ring. I've been looking at rings with three stones on them, this one I like because it has three sides which can be symbolic of: my three kids or God, Jesus and Holy Ghost. The two diamonds can be a symbol of me and Jared. What do you think?

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Choose An Identity

I think it's kinda funny when you leave a comment on a blog and it says, "Choose an identity." I thought about this question a lot and ask, "Hmmm. Who would I like to be today?"

When I was in first grade, I'll never forget sitting in class and the teacher was calling the roll. She called my name. I ignored it....on purpose. She called me again and looked up, "Krista?" I remember looking everywhere except her eyes and answered, "My name is changed."

She asked, "Oh really? What's your new name?"

"Karen," I answered proudly.

"Karen?" She asked. Yes! My class will call me by my favorite name now! "You'll have to bring a note from home telling me your name is changed." I could feel a tiny, six year old size dagger go through my little six year old heart. I was caught in my lie. Darn! Now I'll have to be stuck with being plain old Krista.

The other day I forwarded an e-mail from my home account to my friend at work's account. She wrote back, "Who is this from? What is your name?" So of course, I take this opportunity to tell her my name is "Princess Krista, Her Royal Highness, Her Majesty, but you can call me Krista." It's funny how that title makes you hold your head up a little higher.

Have you ever dressed up for Halloween and felt "in character?" That usually happens when I dress up like a witch. Have you dressed up for a formal occasion and felt ..... lacking a word here ..... elite? Have you been caught in your pajamas at 1:00 in the afternoon and felt like a lazy slob? Me neither.

So....what identity would you choose?

Monday, May 4, 2009


Ever since I was a little kid, I thought that was a funny line. You have to imagine that being said after one has sucked in helium and followed by, "Take me to your leader." It seems as if I have actually fallen off the planet, but I'm back. If even for a short visit.

I have a confession that I'm very leery on sharing. A small explanation for my disappearance (besides the fact that I was kidnapped by aliens and used as a scientific experiment.) I have been fighting "stinkin' thinkin'" which has gone beyond stinkin' thinkin' and classified as depression. I'm not the kind that usually advertises my problems because there is no market for them. The thing with depression is you don't really have a problem, per se, which makes you feel even worse for feeling the way you do.

In desperation of better feelings, I thought I would try tanning (or fake baking) at a local tanning joint. I'm not one who likes to tan - even naturally. I tanned about seven years ago when we went on a cruise in the middle of February and I didn't want to burn.

I've decided something even more awkward than standing in line at the Bishop's office is standing in line for a tanning bed. You don't want to make eye contact. When you do make eye contact with a person leaving you think, "Ew. Their butt sweat is on the bed I'm going to lie on." I know, they "sanitize" the beds but I sanitize mine again when I'm in there in case they missed a spot.

As I'm laying there I think about - wait. Awkward. I better be careful what I write here. My BFF, Karen, says she would like to tan but doesn't like basting in her own juices. So that makes me think about turkey which makes me think about chicken which makes me think about chicken knuckles falling off which makes me think about this. Then I wonder if that man I saw walking out of a tanning room earlier (Ew - guy butt sweat) was a policeman because I can smell bacon!!! Just kidding. Honestly, there is no occupation I have more respect for. But I did smell bacon and I did think that and I'm very sorry. And I laughed as I lay by myself in the broiler. Then I think about a song and try to refrain from singing. I always have a song in my head and I'm convinced I'm a perpetual musical.

Then I think how I'm in the buff and I'm getting a tan where the sun doesn't naturally shine. That makes me think of smokin' crack. I don't know why. I've never smoked crack. Probably because I can hear some cracklin' noises and wonder how much fat I'm burning off. Then I think of my son (and National Underwear Day) who stopped into my work today to say hi. Then I think of my daughter who wants to be in a pageant this summer because I hope she doesn't want to tan because it's so bad for your skin. Then I think of my other daughter who has freckles on her cute little nose because she plays in the sun, which is so bad for your skin.

Suddenly, I'm feeling much better. I thought my husband only paid for a month, which I was happy with (or as happy as you could be with depression.) Obviously my husband thinks I needed the light therapy because he actually signed me up for two months which should bring me into summer. Now I'm really upset with him because he must think I'm hard to live with and that's why he paid for two months. Now I'm depressed again, which reminds me of chocolate which reminds me of peanut butter which reminds me of the road to Heaven. Then I'm happy again.