Friday, April 30, 2010


Just like Horton hears the Who's I can hear all my friends in Blogville talking to me. Actually, I'm usually the one talking to you. "Hello! Can you hear me?"

I finally saw my daughter's high school musical tonight, "Suessical the Musical." I had school the last two nights so I missed those. I'll be going again tomorrow night, too. I survived the day with another headache (literally) in which I had an MRI on my neck for. I was really expecting them to say I was a host body for an alien that is trying to crawl out of the back of my head but they didn't say that. They said I have a couple of bulging discs in the bottom of my neck. So I'm like, "Great. More bulges." No more pictures of the back of my head now. At least I still have cute ankles.

So back to Ali and Suessical. This is her with a girl she grew up with that lived in our old neighborhood. "Aubs" was a fancy bird and Ali was Gertrude McFuzz. So cute to see them 13 years down the road.

Here's Ali with the Horton/Gertrude offspring. If only having children were as easy as sitting on an egg. My Mimi was jealous and thought she should have played the hatchling. Another star is rising!

Here is Ali with her bestie, Joey giving Horton a little kiss. Joey was a Who and was a darn darlin' Who! I don't know who Horton really is. I wouldn't recognize him on the street without his trunk.

Another week survived. Another brag moment. The bird gets the elephant in the end. Thanks for listening to me brag twice in a week. Oh, not to be overlooked - my little Mimi had a piano recital. And she did awesome. All in a day's work.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Spring Preparation

Spring is supposed to be here. It's time for us to be working on our bikini bodies for Summer, right? I'm encouraged for two reasons: 1/ Spring may never arrive here in my state. 2/ There will always be someone that looks worse than me by the pool. Of course there will always be those that look better. Whatever. I say Spring may never come because it snowed last week and then warmed up again by the end of the day. Some of the damage it left behind:They say women have an extra layer of body fat to keep them warm. These ladies were so warm they had to take some of their extra clothes off.

I'm suddenly not feeling so bad about being caught half naked at the pool. Though I cover up a little more than those girls and others are grateful. Are we ever satisfied? Too hot, too cold. Too young, too old. Too poor, too rich. Nah. Is it possible to be too rich? I'd like to find out.

Right now my hair is too short. When I went to the hairdresser two weeks ago, my hair was NOT too long. She asked, "How much should we take off, and inch? Half an inch?" I said, "Let's keep the length and just thin it out." I thought maybe I'd try once again to grow it a little longer.

Well, she colored it back to my natural color (blonde, of course) and then came the haircut. The deal is I've been going to this hairdresser for the 14 years I've lived in the states, after living in Australia for seven years. She cut my hair before I moved to Australia, so I've known her over 20 years. Therefore, we are comfortable talking about a lot of things. I'm no longer comfortable.

The subject was her husband. He was in big trouble. The more she talked about him the shorter my hair became. Next thing you know it was lesbian short. It looks awful. My hair has never been this short before. I feel like I need to explain to people that I am straight. I didn't say anything after she was done, because after I wash it and do it myself it usually looks better. It didn't. The next day I looked in the mirror and I thought swear words. Mainly the question, "What the hell?" I just wanted to cry. But it's just dead protein growing out of my head and it grows back, right? Two weeks later and I still have a man's hairdo. Almost a comb over.

My friends at work said, "Oh, you're back to blonde." When they saw my awful hair. They didn't say, "Cute haircut," or anything. Just that I was back to blonde. My brother said yesterday he hated my hair and wanted to disown me. My husband said, "I do not like your hair that short." My kids were shocked. WTH? What's the use of having a nice face if your hair sucks?

The problem is, I've been going to her for a long time. I haven't been very happy with my hair for the last several cuts and colors. I don't know if she's losing her touch or if she's in too big of a hurry because she usually has a couple of clients processing at a time. Once she over processed my hair and it came out looking ash gray instead of ash blonde. I sent her a note on Facebook and let her know I didn't know what to do with my hair being this short. She said, "Come in and get some wax." I said, "I already have products." What to do, what to do. Friendship......or nice hair?

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Brag Moment - Please Tolerate

Okay, okay. I realize other people "just aren't into my kids" as much as I am. You could care less about the fact that my beautiful daughter went to prom with her boyfriend and her bestie and her bestie's boyfriend last night.
From left to right, Caden, Ali, Alex and Jocelyn (aka Joey). And they wore my favorite two colors. Not pink and black - pink and pinker, of course!
They all looked super smashing!
Here are the two beauties posing without their dates. It's kind of a shame no matter what boys do, they just don't look as stunning as girls. They try - and they do clean up well. But there's just something about a girl in a princessy dress.

Here is my darling daughter with her cute boyfriend. I thought I would only torture you with only three pictures...... though I have many, many more. I haven't looked at the disk full that Joey's dad sent over, yet. One might just happen to slip in in another post. Thanks for tolerating my brag moment. I just love that girl! She has amazing friends, too.

Friday, April 23, 2010

Psychic Stuff

I came across this in an e-mail today. I thought it was pretty funny.

We (the secretaries) went out to lunch today with our two bosses. One boss is a serious kind of guy......retiring in the near future. Everyone walks on eggshells until they know what kind of day he is having. I'm lucky because I come in last and miss any action, so I've never seen it. He's always very nice to me.

As we were waiting for our table, Boss was standing next to me when the subject turned to horoscopes and astrology. That reminded me of this story, which I shared with the other eight co-workers:

My friend and I were in the mall one day and there was a psychic there reading palms. She tried to coax us over and we said, "No. We don't really believe in that stuff."

She said, "Well, I can tell you are both Aquarius." That was a little freaky so we went over to talk to her. She asked if she could read my palm and I told her I didn't believe in that stuff and she said, "I won't even charge you. I just think you would have an interesting palm."

So I let her humor herself and look at my palm. She said, "You had a life before this life. You were a dog." I just kind of laughed.

"You were a family pet who was well loved and you were tragically ran over by a stagecoach and that is how you died."

"Okay. Well thanks," I said and as we were ready to walk off she said, "To prove it you have a bump on your left shoulder." We laughed and walked off. Later out of curiosity, I felt my shoulder and sure enough there is a lump.

My co-workers listened intently. I felt my shoulder and said, "I seriously have a lump on my shoulder. Feel right here, Boss." As he reached over I snapped at his hand and let out a vicious bark. He retracted his hand quickly and we all laughed hysterically.

This is a great joke to play on your kids, too. I can see it in your future to tell that story because I know you have a great sense-of-humor! Let me know how it goes!

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Inside the Mind of a Computer Geek

I have about a 25 minute drive home from school three nights a week. Class ends at 9:00. You'd THINK I could think of some good bloggin' stuff. Here's what I'm really thinking about:

1. The person sitting behind me needs to blow his nose. It is whistling. His breathing sounds like he's fallen asleep with a deep breath in......pause......deep breath out. It whistles every night of class. I'd like to stick a flash drive up his nose.

2. There's not very many females in that class. One with piercings on her face and a lady who looks like a retired hippy. She has a long gray braid going down her back and wears strange clothes. I think she may be wearing a tent from Woodstock. That makes me the hottest! Hottest....burning binary code on disks.....

3. Multimedia, authoring tools, RAM, ROM, videos, kHz, interface........

4. I wish I could have a cookie dough milkshake this late at night and not gain weight.

5. Ethernet, LAN, WAN.....

6. I wonder what my blog friends are up to?

7. SCSI is pronounced "scuzzy." What's it mean again?

8. Trying to think of something for my blog.....funny.....

9. Bitmap, vector.......

10. What kind of memory doesn't lose info if the power goes out? Do I have RAM in my head?

I now know what a computer geek thinks. I've crossed over to another dimension. My next class will be Photoshop so I hope I have more creative thoughts then. "Creativity is your greatest asset in multimedia." I can't turn it off.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Some Random Pink Stuff

Just another day in know, I wake up, eat my Shredded Wheat and Bran cereal with chocolate soymilk, have a headache, take Excedrin and a handful of vitamins, clean house in my pjs, and some one knocks on my door at the early hour of noon. I'm still in my pjs, braless and feel the need to fold my arms. The choice is to either tuck them under my arms or hold them up with my arms. I should have practiced in the mirror to see which looks better. It's probably dangerous to do housework without a bra on anyway. But I didn't want to get that all sweaty and stuff anyway since they cost like $50.

Mimi announces, "It's Katie!"

I said, "Tell her to come in. COME IN, KATIE!" She says, "I CAN'T." So I come to the door, half tucked in, half tucked out (can't hide 'em) and she points behind her. Down my three stairs is a BABY CARRIAGE with her new adopted baby girl! So I had to go outside and show the neighbors, that yes, I am a pink maniac with a beer gut that is actually boobs without support, but who cares? It was a cute little precious bundle of perfect girlishness! She was asleep and looking so sweet. Now I have an excuse to go out and buy a cute pink outfit which will happen next Saturday because this one was shot.

I sang happy songs as I cleaned my toilet (or maybe I swore to familiar tunes) and had a meeting at the high school with the "Productions Director" to counsel her on colors. Did I mention my Ali is playing Gertrude McFuzz in "Suessical the Musical"? So it looks like my Tuesday night will be spent painting or detailing or something.

Then I took Ali to try on prom dresses at my friend's house and she is going to wear a very princessy pink dress. Daughter's just shouldn't look that cute at 17, they should wait until they are closer to breeding age, like 25. Especially, when she has a friend that she's been dating for the last eight months and has only graduated to boyfriend status two weeks ago. And you know how long it takes boys to mature. He's a sweet boy, but can he really last that long? Maybe I'll go to prom with them. That will be the true test. He has passed other tests, like he actually sang karaoke with me. And when I blamed him for leaving Mimi's Littlest Pet Shop toys all over the living room he said he wasn't finished playing with them. So he's quick, too. Maybe I could adopt him and make it really awkward.

To end my day I read all my favorite blogs and left brilliant comments on each of them. This is my world and I think they were brilliant. If I didn't leave a brilliant comment on yours, then let me know and I will rectify that.

Which brings me to my next topic (don't fall asleep yet) is HOW THE HECK do some people have so many followers? I read one un-named blog (not on my sidebar) with a gazillion followers and it was all about how wonderful they were and calling the readers names, which won't be repeated. I don't get it. "'Cause I'm so great and all you %$#(# love my butt!" Basically. I kinda get sick of that and un-follow their cocky butts. 'Cause I consider myself a friend and not a fan of some puffed up ego. Maybe none of you have ever visited blogs like that before. One power outage and POOF! Your fans are gone but your friends are here to stay. So I hope you didn't mind me bragging about my droopy boobs earlier.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

All in a Week

How do you go from this:

To this
in the same week? I actually had nightmares about wasps the same night I took this photo. So really, how do you go from snow to Spring and back to snow? I hope it killed all those horrible wasps.
I have a nightmare story about a hornet. When I lived in Australia it was a well-known fact that I was petrified of bugs. PETRIFIED - I say. I still am, but our bugs here seem relatively small in comparison. Entomophobia is the fear of bugs. If you say it real fast it kind of sounds like "enema-phobia." I'm afraid of those, too.
I must explain that those Aussies are tough people. I don't think I met one wimp in the seven years I lived there. They thought I was a bit of a freak to be afraid of bugs. They don't need modern conveniences like dryers, furnaces and air-conditioners in Queensland. They open their windows to let the fresh air in and who needs screens? What's a little preying mantis, Christmas beetle or wasp? Just get the fly swatter out and smash 'em, right?
One sunny day, I noticed a humongous wasp flew in my living room window. It flew right into my shadow box and flew back out. A minute later it flew back in, went to the same section in the shadow box and flew back out. PETRIFIED I was. It did this a few more times and I realized it may be making it's home in my shadow box. I slammed down the window and every window in my house in the blazing hot summer. It flew to the window, trying to get in and then to my kitchen window. It was after me. So when I called my husband at work and told him he had to come home to kill "a stinging thing that was after me," he thought I was over-exaggerating.
"I have to leave this house! It's after me! It's going to get me!"
In his Aussie accent he said, "Just wait 'til I get home tonight, I'll get it then," trying to be sympathetic.
"I can't stay inside with the windows down with the kids!" I scooped them up and put them in the car. I saw the hornet still flying around the window. I drove to my in-laws. I told them about "the stinging thing that was after me." They, too, thought I was exaggerating. I never exaggerate, so I don't get it. They laughed at me and assured me it wasn't actually after me. I called Jared from there and told him I wasn't coming home. I know he was laughing inside and probably annoyed by my phobia. He got used to me screaming every time I opened a kitchen cupboard when I found TWO INCH COCKROACHES lying on their backs with their legs still moving, moving ever so slowly, dying from the pesticide. Shudder.
He called his parents house to talk to me. "You won't believe this!" he said excitedly. "As soon as I came home and opened the window it flew in and it came after me! But don't worry, I've killed it, you can come home now." And that is why he is like my own personal Steve Irwin. "Aw, it's just a little fella with a stinger on it's rear. It won't harm you unless you provoke it to defend itself." I never exaggerate when it comes to bugs. And this one was after me.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

What a Wonderful World

Some of you have asked how do I do it all? Well, I am blessed with wonderful people in my life and I try to be a wonderful person back. Try being the key word. I've been working full-time for about a year and a half. I am surrounded by wonderful people there.

Before that I worked other little jobs and met many wonderful people and learned great things - even from the adorable kids I substituted for, or taught art to. And before that I was a full-time mom to three wonderful kids. And before that I was a wife to a wonderful man, who has become even more wonderful over the years.

Errrrrt! Now I'm a part-time mom, part-time wife, working full-time, going to school part-time and then there's that necessary fun on the weekend which makes me a part-time friend. People have said, "You might have to give up blogging." You know who said those kind of nasties? People who don't read my blog - or any blogs. They don't get it. They don't get the artistic outlet of blogging and how much your blog friends mean. Even though some of us haven't even met, I feel like you're my friend and I love reading about your families and funny thoughts, too. I may have to blog a little less, but heck! Blogging has led me to my new career path in graphic design.

So you may be wondering how I'm doing in my classes. I clept out of a basic computer knowledge class. I finished my next ten hour "module" in 7.5 hours and got a 92% on my test. I'm almost done with my second "module" of 30 hours in about 15 hours and will take that test this week. I wish I could learn faster because I want to do the fun stuff, like design and draw. I was really worried that I would have a hard time retaining information because I seriously can't remember what I had for dinner last night. But so far so good. I was a good student back in the day, but it's been 25 years. So wish me luck! My next class is Photoshop, so I'm so excited to get started on that! Maybe I'll post more pictures of myself when I learn how to erase a chin!

So the next part of my wonderful world is I went shopping yesterday at JC Penney and I got three pairs of pants and a shirt to wear to work, a hoodie, two shirts and some leggins for Mimi all for $42!!!! I also had a Tupperware Party that morning and made lunch for my friends and it turned out wonderful. Then we got together with some friends in the evening and watched "Nacho Libre." Now I have a wonderful headache! Anyway, have a wonderful day!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Modern Technology a Curse

No picture for today's "Oh my heck!" This time you'll have to use your imagination. Imagine a very rainy day when I got off work early. I thought I would have a small outing to the mall with my girls. Ali had to work at 5:00 at the mall anyway, and since her car accident we have been short a car, so that took care of her ride to work.

We shopped, got a Mrs. Field's cookie, bought a couple of fun things and Ali went to work. It was pouring down rain when we got in my van when I had a thought: If Jared picked us up after work, I could leave my van there at the mall and no one will have to go out again to pick Ali up at 10:00. Good plan. Jared agreed and I ran my keys back into the mall to Ali. Instead of dragging Mimi out in the rain again I had her wait in my van, but don't worry, I locked the doors while she played with her Littlest Pet Shop pets.

After giving my keys to Ali I ran to the van in the pelting rain and knocked on the window. Mimi came to the driver's side and pulled on the handle. "Unlock the door!" I yelled. She pushes on the window button. "NO! Unlock it! Push the button!" Meanwhile, the rain is POURING on me. She pulls on the handle again. Rain is soaking through two layers of fleece fabric in my hoodie. "Push the button! Right there - push it forward!"

"I don't know which button!" she's panicking, pulling on the handle again.

"OH MY HECK!" I'm freaking out because not only am I getting soaked, Mimi is locked in the car. It reminds me of the blonde who locked herself in the car and someone had to get a coat hanger to get her out. My daughter does not know how to unlock a car door without a remote control - nor can she roll down the windows without keys in the ignition. My husband pulls up and sees me standing outside of my car, treading water at this point and shouting at Mimi directions for unlocking the car. He had to stop his car and turn it off and bring the keys over to unlock the door. Yep, that's modern technology for you. Our next family meeting will be how to unlock the car door from the inside without a remote control.

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Happy Easter!

I dragged out an old photo of Mimi from Easter in 2006. She looks so innocently sweet. She has Brady in almost every photo we take of her, including our family Christmas portrait year before last. We had a very nice Easter at my step-family's house and had our traditional homemade Italian food - raviolis, gnocchis, Italian pizza (which is more like a quiche kind of thing) and lots of goodies. The littlies went on an Easter Egg hunt. It was nice to spend the day with family.

I had a headache most of the day and I laid in my bed with an icepack on my neck to try to relieve it (along with Excedrin, Klonapin and Jared massaging me) and my sweet little girl read a Junie B. Jones book to me while I had my eyes closed. It was the "Dumb Bunny" book. We both laughed at the funny parts. If you have never read any Junie B. Jones books, I highly recommend them. I read them when I substitued a first grade class and had to stop reading to laugh. They take about 20 minutes to read a whole book.

I don't know if I've mentioned I work full-time as a secretary and I'm now doing classes three nights a week going into graphic design. So far I'm enjoying it - lots to learn and gradually dusting the cobwebs out of my head. I haven't gotten to the fun stuff yet - just all the technical stuff explaining the broad range of career paths in multimedia.

I hope you had a very nice Easter!