Saturday, February 13, 2010


Sometimes words are just not enough. Pictures can say so much more. So when I was shopping at an Asian grocery store with my mom and husband, I couldn't believe my eyes.

First I should say it's my birthday and we went out to a yummy Gastronomy restaurant where I had the best salad with crab and jumbo shrimp in it and two Diet Cokes. So as we were shopping nature called. Then it started yelling and I know I'm going to pay a big embarrassing price for not listening to the first calls one of these days. So, I looked for the restroom in this Asian grocery store. Wouldn't you know? The women's restroom was "Closed from people flushing unflushables." True. That's what the sign said. Then a worker lady yells and points to the door next to it and yells, "Go in that one!" Well, that's what I was about to do with or without her permission.

This is what I see:

I really couldn't believe that this was real life, but I was desperate. So the view from the loo was this:

After flushing legitimate flushables, I ask you see a sink? Neither do I. Lucky I ate ribs last week and kept my little handi-wipe in my purse.

You'd think by now I would have a phobia of public toilets. I actually Googled that to see if there was an actual name for that phobia. There is not. You'd think there would be a term describing an actual condition that I know a lot of people have.

There's "verminophobia" which is the fear of germs. "Pathophobia" is the fear of disease. Another scary one is "Coprophobia" which is the fear of feces. I read a simple description, but not designated term called "toilet phobia." Most of us have had toddlers that we swear had that one, but when you think about it in proportion, if you had to sit on something the size of a small swimming pool that could swallow you whole, you would be afraid, too. Maybe have a little aquaphobia.

I learned about a phobia called "alektorophobia" which is the fear of chickens. Now, I know a lot of people and none of them are afraid of chickens, but I know plenty of people who put a toilet seat liner on and still hover over the toilet in fear of germs, disease, urine, butt sweat, fecal matter or even the toilet bowl ogre. WHY does this fear not have a name?! This is a legitimate condition and I am very close to having it. I am signing up for a gymnastics class next week just so I can maneuver the public restrooms.


Karen said...

I could just hear the Asian woman saying that. I too, suffer from that phobia. In fact I have that phobia of the toilet the kids use in my house. Oh and the butt sweat....I have never even thought about that. EWWWWWW!

I hope your day was fabulous!

Nancy said...

There's a lesson to be learned here. No flushing unflushables!!

Anonymous said...

I can just hear you mimicking that asian woman

I always carry little hand wipes with me and I ALWAYS put toilet paper down on the seat first using any toilet that is not my own or people I know that are hygienic. I use toilet paper or my sleeve or some material on my person to touch/open all doors etc. The foot works well too, or even waiting that extra couple of seconds for someone to come through the door (when you can hear them coming). At all odds I DON'T touch anything.

Also, my biggest pet hate is people leaving the toilet lid up after they have used the toilet. They even flush whilst it is up and leave it up permanently...well there is a lid for a purpose. If you've ever seen a slow motion sneeze from someone you will know just how far those germs fly....well that's exactly how it happens in a bathroom when the toilet lid is left up whilst flushing....germs ALL OVER the seat, lid, buttons, walls, light switch, doors, floor....just everywhere....YUCK. Not only is it disgusting leaving the lid up, especially when flushing, but it's really, really bad feng shui because it's like a connection to the sewer inside your house, a big fat gaping hole right into the sewer....hence I really prefer the toilet lid DOWN! Is there a phobia for that? ha ha ha lol

Just a bed of roses said...

nice to visit...EWWWWW too!

See why you get alon with Lisa at blueand shoe.

Come on down to Farmington sometime and you don't want to get to my/barbers bathroom either!!! Oh No, no you wont want to go there. Its an obstacle course...but I pat myself on the back as its getting better.

Leenie said...

My hubby has a serious phobia of chickens. Glad to have a name for that one.

And your fear is a real one in my book. Maybe that is why it doesn't have a phobia name. I'd rather poop in the woods that use some of the fixtures I've seen that are trying to pass for toilets.

Kathi G said...

Krista, if at first you can't find a name for something..... name it yourself!!! Like "Publicus Latrinaphobia" or "Unsanitary Thronaphobia". Or "Kakapottyflushaphobia", which is somewhat difficult to fit on the page, but still really descriptive of the fear you and I share.

Melissa said...

Seriously-I AM afraid of chickens. And now there's a name for it? You just made my day. But I am also afraid of the public restroom, and will avoid it at all costs. At the same time, diet coke is sooooo good. Your salad sounded fab!

Serene is my name, not my life! said...

Oh man! LOL, yuck! And yet, strangely funny!
I went to Paris, France several years ago. I still scared by some of the public restrooms I has to use! *shudder*

Lisa said...

The view from the Loo is my favorite. Thank you for not pointing that camera down. Krista, you slay me.

Fiona said...

When we went to the Phillipines the toilets were closed in McDonalds, so they let us go out back and use the staff toilet, that kinda looked like your picture with a workers lunch bench just outside the door!! Yuck. The flush systems over there are so bad that after I went I think I clogged up the staff toilet!! It was because I needed so much toilet paper to clean the seat. Then there was nothing to dry my hands on, so I used someones jacket hanging up on the hooks!!
We got out of there quick smart...

ldsjaneite said...

Those pictures are hilarious!